Bam! Found Something; Can't Believe I Didn't Think of It Before

Must be the sleep deprivation.

Yes, that's it - sleep deprivation!

I've obviously slept in the past dozen years, but I haven't slept well. I average about five hours of restless sleep a night, and sometimes I take long (one- or two-hour) naps. Even if I napped daily (I don't), I wouldn't be getting my eight hours in. Now, it's true that many people don't need eight hours. But even people who don't need much sleep need good sleep in order to function properly.

My sleep isn't good sleep. I probably don't sleep deeply more than once or twice a week. Most of the time, even as I'm sleeping I feel like I'm semiconscious; I often recall looking at the clock every hour, though I don't recall the time in between these looks.

Sleep deprivation can cause serious cognitive impairment and, yes, even aphasias. It can even cause clumsiness, vertigo, and dizziness - so I guess it's kind of a tossup whether those symptoms are being caused by my spondylosis or just my lack of sleep.

Yay! I might get my life back!!!