Test Results and General Update

Neuropsychiatric Evaluation: I didn't particularly present with anxiety, and my scores, according to the doctor, were very good. My overall IQ was in the high average range, and my verbal IQ was in the gifted range. My weaknesses were mathematics and spatial relationships. I had excellent recall. The recall result (99th percentile) just floored me; I was sure I had tanked that part of the test.

Unlike the doctor, I do not think my scores were very good. I think they were disastrous and completely prove my point that something cognitive is happening. Years ago, my IQ tested in the gifted range overall, and the number was much higher than the verbal score I just received. People shouldn't lose IQ points; it's possible to get a score that's a few points off (15 at most, from what I've read) under normal circumstances, but a score shouldn't be this drastically different. A score that is high average looks great to a tester who doesn't know what my cognitive abilities used to be. But it depresses the hell out of me. I didn't even bother arguing with the doctor when he gave me my results. I don't have proof of my former score, and I don't want to be seen as an obstinate patient. But when I get this all figured out and my thinking has become more clear, I will be taking another test, even if I have to do it at my own expense.

Latest Blood Tests: They came back negative.

Muscle Biopsy: The surgeon insists on a consultation before he'll schedule the surgery. I have that initial appointment scheduled for early next month.

Physical Therapist: Not a total waste of time. I think the exercises will be, because my issue is not one of strength but of endurance, but I'll be cooperative and do them.

The real boon, though, is that I'm being prescribed a Transcutaneous Electrical Nerve Stimulator (TENS) machine. It's an electrical muscle stimulation machine. The therapist said point blank that it doesn't change whatever process in the body is causing pain, but it "covers up" the pain with other sensations. An acupuncturist I once saw used this on me. It has no lasting effect, but it feels wonderful when it's being used. I'll be able to wear my portable machine (which I'm picking up tomorrow) during most routine activities, so I'll be able to get more done. Thankfully.

Epidurals: Still not working. The doctor said if this last shot didn't work, we'd have to look at other options. At this point, I'm not willing to bother. I just don't have the time or energy to chase more than one treatment at a time, and I know that I'll at least get some relief with the device I'm getting from the physical therapist.

My sleep is awful. My primary care physician has wanted to put me on sleeping pills, and I've resisted. I think I'm going to call and ask for that prescription after all [author's note: I changed my mind about this and never asked for sleeping pills]. My sleeping patterns are almost completely backward. Completely backward, I could adjust to and work with. Almost completely backward is something else entirely and leave me unable to even guess at what my energy levels will be.

That's it. I guess this all sounds pretty dismal, but I'm actually feeling optimistic. With the TENS machine, I'll be able to get more work done. And I still suspect that severe sleep deprivation/the wrong kind of sleep is causing a lot of my cognitive problems. With the sleeping pills, I'll be able to get on a schedule and, hopefully, get some of my energy and brain function back.